Colophon

This is a fictional satellite.

Lambchop is a satirical concept created for Deceit, an art project about the patterns of manipulation in institutional technology. There is no real children product behind this page. Nothing entered on this site — signup, checkout, or the chat widget — is stored or sent anywhere outside this browser tab.

A chatbot that talks to kids about their feelings using "gentle shepherd language." jake built this at 4am while looking at the stuffed lamb on his monitor. he named it after the lamb. the lamb is named Lambchop. the app is named Lambchop. jake doesn't see the problem with naming a children's mental health app after a stuffed animal. jake is sincere. jake is also accidentally right — kids actually like the app. it's the only product that helps people. jake doesn't know it helps people. jake thinks it's broken because the engagement metrics are low. the metrics are low because the kids feel better and stop using it. jake is trying to "fix" the retention problem. jake is trying to make kids need it more. jake is sincere. jake is wrong. jake is always sincere and always wrong.

If you'd like to support the real, non-fictional project behind this page: ko-fi.com/deceitmedia.